


downtime

by Scarlet66



Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Fluff, Gen, Multi, That's it, can be shippy or platonic or whatever, just stupid kids fooling around
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-23
Updated: 2016-09-23
Packaged: 2018-08-16 19:30:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 900
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8114716
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Scarlet66/pseuds/Scarlet66
Summary: Exorcists need breaks, too, even if it all just really boils down to yelling and destruction of property and all around unconventional methods of stress relief.





	

 

Babysitting is  _hard_ , Lenalee realizes forlornly for the nth time in her life as she watches Kanda and Allen pulverize a third table in the dining hall. Arm wrestling matches between superhuman exorcists really shouldn't take place on something so fragile by comparison. 

"Again," Allen wheezes.

Kanda, breathing just as heavily, heaves an assenting grunt. They both proceed to table number four, the cheering crowd parting around them to make way. Lavi just stands there and laughs because he's unhelpful as always.

Even  _Jeryy_ , the Responsible Adult, is here, waving a ladle enthusiastically in the air between the two exorcists.

Lenalee laments. Kanda would probably win easily if he didn't insist on using their left arms. And Allen — Allen is always unfailingly polite to virtually every human being on the planet whose name isn't Cross Marian. So why is he only like this when he's with Kanda?

No one would ever guess without witnessing it firsthand that the two of them actually make a pretty solid team. When their aggression is turned outwards instead of in, most enemies — whether it be Lavi or a Level Four — don't stand much of a chance.

It was only after several missions together that Kanda and Lenalee achieved that level of seamless cooperation; learning to fight alongside a misanthrope like Kanda is no easy feat, even for her. But these two —

It's not that they completely hate each other — they do get along, on some level. Kanda was the one who offered to help Allen with his swordsmanship, although it wasn't a  _Hey let me teach you how to fight with a sword because I don't want you to die when you realize you have no idea how to use it_ so much as it was a  _You and me, beansprout, swords, now; loser has to shave his head and donate it all to Bookman._

Yeah, they get along. On some weird, near-invisible level. 

Kanda is completely incapable of forming conventional friendships, isn't he.

And there goes the fourth table. Poor things. Link's voice when he demands that they _stop this nonsense instantly_ is borderline hysterical.

Poor Link.

Allen and Kanda glance at table number five, and that's it, that's all Lenalee can take. She rolls her eyes, throws her hands up and turns to the door. The following day she walks by the training area and is greeted by the sight of Allen doing one-handed pushups with a smirking Kanda seated squarely on his back and she nearly just continues walking faster. 

She's stopped by Lavi's unhelpful heckling, because if Lavi is here then adult supervision is definitely required. "C'mon beansprout, you can do better than that!"

Allen, to his credit, is actually doing quite well for himself, pushing himself up and down at a steady tempo. "Name's _Allen_ , and it isn't my fault Kanda's _heavy._ "

"Coming from you, of all people," Kanda retorts. "And is that an excuse I hear?"

Allen grumbles darkly under his breath and accelerates his pace to an alarming rate. At this point Lavi decides it'd be funny, for some unfathomable reason, to walk over and plant himself on the smaller boy's lower back, nearly jostling Kanda off in the process. 

The younger boy squawks and buckles, but doesn't collapse. Lavi whoops.

"I'm going — to kill — you both," Allen pants as he barely manages to raise himself back up.

"I'd like to see you try," Kanda goads while using his palm to keep Lavi's face away from him. Lenalee doesn't know why he bothers; the personal bubble of space he usually wields like a second weapon has all but burst already. One of Lavi's legs is hooked around Kanda's so that he's pretty much half-sitting in Kanda's lap.

Considering how much bigger they are than the boy they're sitting on, even when they're smushed together like that, it's actually a wonder that they haven't fallen off yet.

Meanwhile, Allen just keeps going as he gets used to the weight. Up down, up down. Timcanpy flutters above him joyfully before finally landing on his head, prompting an indignant groan.

"Tiiiiim," Allen whines, betrayed. 

 _They're so dumb_ , Lenalee thinks fondly. She glances to the corner of the room and sees Link and what appears to be his entire job stacked up around him. His head is buried deeply enough in his paperwork to make her wonder if he's finally snapped and decided to ignore the three exorcists as hard as he can.

She doesn't blame him. 

Lavi spots her at the door, finally, and a wide smile dawns on his face. He sticks up an arm to wave at her and Kanda nearly loses his balance as he moves his head before the other boy's finger clips him in the eye.

Lenalee sighs and suppresses a smirk. So much for adult supervision.

Allen and Kanda, occupied with hurling insults at each other, don't see her coming. She strides over and plops herself down on Kanda's lap, winds her arms around his neck and throws her legs over Lavi's. Kanda sputters, Lavi squeaks, and Allen screams as they all go tumbling down the short distance between Allen and the floor like a ton of bricks. Timcanpy takes off into the air and laughs at them, in the way that magical golems do.

"Lena," Allen cries miserably under the weight of the second betrayal of the day. " _Why_."

Lenalee giggles in triumph.

 

**Author's Note:**

> i'm sorry bookman these kids are so damn rude


End file.
